Creating Change

       “Above all, be the heroine in your life, not the victim”
– Nora Ephron

 

For a long time, I’ve been trying to change aspects of my life, how I feel things, how I see things, how I process things and basically how I deal with everything I need to deal with. I’ve been slowly carving myself into the person I want to be, out of being nervous about this kind of change I did it really, really slowly. The past week at Uni we had a woman come in to talk about her job and basically how she acts and reacts. This was the one thing that kicked my ass into gear about not being nervous of change. It was one of those moments where someone actually draws the line that connects the dots to everything I’ve been trying to put together.

She filled in the blanks that I had about this change to a positive outlook. If you want change you have to create it and cannot leave it to other people. That you should always find the positive in why people behave badly and make poor decisions, not saying that you should applaud it. That it’s about finding out what drives people to understand them, and to understand yourself and your own drive. You don’t need other people’s approval to be and feel great, only you have the power to make yourself feel great and be great; you’re only as great as you think you are, without being narcissistic of course. You have around 15 thousand chances in a day to be kind to yourself.

I always had an idea in my head of the kind of life I wanted for myself and the older I get the more it changes, when I was a kid I always thought that I would be a stay-at-home wife but now that I work and go to uni there is no way I could spend my day at home most of the time. I’ve also learnt that change is constant in life whether you’re ready for it or not and taking charge and responsibility of change is important. Almost nothing in life goes the way you imagine or the way you tell yourself in your head, and when I got over that and accepted that it is what it is, I was happier. I didn’t get miserable over things not going my way or getting mad that someone isn’t acting how they should be. It was a huge learning experience for me.

Everyone goes through ups and downs in life, you could be so in-touch with yourself but still suffer from time to time. However, getting into a habit of looking positively at things and not only understanding yourself and your limits but also understanding other people is important. when I started changing how I reacted to things, I also noticed my self confidence go up, I started allowing myself to wear the clothes I feel comfortable in and be able to outside without makeup on.

Here are some tips I use for creating change:

1) Know exactly what your goals are

What do you want to achieve? Be realistic, ask yourself how you want to go about achieving it. Don’t let the negative thoughts stick around like “I can’t do this” or “is it really worth it?” Stick to your guns.

2) Make a plan to follow

Break down your goals into little goals to get there, if it’s to lose weight, for example, make a goal of swapping certain foods with healthy options then move onto the bigger picture.

3) It will be uncomfortable to start 

Change will always make you uncomfortable to begin with but asking yourself “what will my life be like in 5 years if I stay the same?” will motivate you if you don’t like your current situation deep down.

4) Remain motivated and have a relapse plan

Instead of giving up when you fall back into habit, just correct yourself and let yourself know that it’s normal. Creating a little journal full of your change, this will help you to notice anything that works and anything that doesn’t work. Remain confident and you will be able to do it!

All in all change is hard work, but the pay off is wonderful. It teaches resilience and get you into the new habits that you want in your life. You can’t complain about your issues and just expect them to change, you have to do the changing. No one else can do that for you. I have supportive people around me that always help me out and encourage me to be who I want to be, and if you have those people around you, you can’t fail.

I hope this was helpful and easy to understand! Let me know your thoughts!

— Thanks for stopping by —

{ I haven’t posted in a while but I have a few posts coming up such as a couple of Michael Jackson book reviews, daily makeup and hair tutorials }

 

 

 

 

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