“The only person you should try to be better than is the person you were yesterday.”
Today I’m going to talk about life and why you shouldn’t worry about others and their opinions. This sounds all good in theory and hard in reality, but with practice you can get your life to exactly where you want it!
You don’t owe anyone anything. Live your life on your terms and not what other people want or expect of you. You know, getting to the point in your life where you really do not care about how others perceive you is difficult, and I’m still learning the ropes; which is why I’m making this post so you can go on the journey as well.
Most people don’t actually know you
People who don’t know you well will expect you to be like them or similar to them, therefore they will underestimate you and treat you accordingly. A lot of the time this will make you mad, but it’s actually a positive thing! How, you ask? Because it shows how little they know you and the fact that you will be underestimated means you’re probably worth a lot more than they think. You can either spend your time proving them wrong or you can live your life seeing the positives in it.
Most of the time, people don’t actually take the time to get to know you or you to get to know them and there could be a million reasons as to why. Either way, perceptions will be incorrect of the other person. Picture someone you don’t really know but see or are around them often, do you know what they are capable of? Have they experienced a lot in their life? Do they have any history of trauma? Are they easy going? Do they have a sense of humor? Do they get anxious around people? Are they in an okay spot in their life? You probably cannot answer this, am I right?
What do you want out of your life?
Do you actually know what you want out of life? Instead of just going with the flow, pick the path or life you want and face all the challenges to make it happen. Do you want a positive life? Do you know the steps to get there? You don’t have to know exactly what you want out of life but having a rough idea helps a lot.
Make a list of things you want in/out of your life and things you want gone from your life. Focus on those things you want and work on them. Take responsibility of the things you want gone from your life, why do you want them gone? Is it for the right reasons?
How do others perceive you or how do you perceive others?
This part isn’t all that important but it is worth a read of! Do you put people off because you try to intimidate them? If so, do you really think that’s the kind of life you want to follow. While it is important that you live your life on your terms, it’s also important to not do it in a way that harms other people. It’s never a good look scaring people away and word of that sort of thing does spread. Sometimes, it’s best to be open and straight with people. Let people know their place in your life and leave it at that.
You don’t always have to fit the picture someone paints of you, you also don’t have to put up with other negative perceptions. Know when enough is enough.
Being an adult
A big part of living your life is being an adult about it. Taking responsibility for your actions and knowing when to own up to them. Live your life to the fullest, travel to wherever you can afford, do the things you want to do. But don’t blame other people for your life not going the way you planned. There are to a degree, exceptions for that but for the most part you are solely responsible for how you deal and approach things in your life. As someone once said, life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it. (I feel like that might not be quite the correct quote but the same nonetheless).
When life doesn’t turn out how you want it to
That’s okay, we can’t plan everything. We also can’t control everything. Starting again and how you approach starting again is the key to success. The truth is, I’ve found that you can only control things like what you study and what you dedicate your time to, but you can’t control the people around you and sometimes, the events that take place around you.
The take home message: Do what you can, know your limits, let go of the idea of control and do no intentional harm.